Friday, December 4, 2009

How to properly gkick someone

I got to gkick a douche bag last night, always a fun event. In all actuality, I'm sort of grateful to the guy because it coincided so nicely with the fact that I wanted to talk about gkicking and how to properly do so.

Here's the lead-up to the events of last night. Everyone is hanging about, minding their own business. There's talk about 3.3 and what people plan on doing as soon as it hits and, honestly, I'm not paying too much attention to guild chat because I somehow got suckered into helping out some priest in Nagrand with all their group quests when all I was trying to do was get exalted with the Kurenai. (See prior post re: Whoring, Me)

But then this one guy leaps into the conversation, which is odd in and of itself since he never really says anything to anyone, and hasn't for something like a year. He's been one of those people you wonder why is even in the guild because he gains nothing and contributes nothing, but since he also harms nothing you don't boot him. So to have him suddenly asking whether the next patch was when we were going to get goblins and worgen was... odd, but just brushed it off as him being stupid.

Then real stupid happened. He started to talk about how his account had been 'haked' and he was naked. Several people who had also been hacked before started to give him advice on what to do. His response?

"u all need to give me ur ore so I can make stuff 2nite."

No one hesitated to jump all over that and tell him no. Then someone in officer chat said that he had taken stuff from the guild bank - random crap that no warrior would ever want. I demoted him and sent him a tell, basically telling him that his attitude was not going to fly and he better shape up if he ever wanted to have privileges in the guild again.

"sry" he said.

A few moments later, he sent me another tell, "it wouldn't make me made if you kicked me frm the guild"

I typed out, "It wouldn't make me sad to kick you, either." Then deleted it. No need to be a jerk.

Then one of the other officers had a good idea. It took a few tries but he finally snagged this guy's meandering attention and asked him which character was his main.

"This is," he said.

Which was not true. So, figuring he had been hacked or sold, and not liking his attitude and theft, no matter if it was petty, I kicked him. (names fuzzed because no one in the guild has really given me overt permission to write about them, ha) 

(Clicky to embiggen, but the gist of it is there.)

No one exactly cried to see him go.

And for me, I had to contain myself just a little because gkicking is such a fun and heady experience. In fact, it was so fun I had to ask if there was anyone else on who wanted to say something stupid. Everyone jumped at that chance and bam, we were off on politics and Climategate.

How many other people employ the SPARTA method for kicking?

And how many weeks will I have guildies logging in and instantly demanding everyone give them all "ur ore"? Since we still have one officer spamming "anyone wanna run SM" about three months after THAT beggar annoyed the piss outta us, I have the feeling it could be a while.


  1. I need some ore to get some stuff made...

    And I too have used the Sparta thing, most memorably for a person that had a nack for racist "jokes" in gchat. No great loss, eh?

  2. I was on for that one, that was hilarious, the guy was actually laughing right before you kicked him.

  3. I still think one of the best gkicks ever was when Noxy (I think it was) booted the guy stirring up shit over the GM's girlfriend.

  4. yeppers, that was me too. Ah, the good 'ole days...

  5. and both of em whispered me later "that was a joke, right?" hahaha Joke's on you, jackass!

  6. Everyone thinks you are nicer than you actually are.

  7. hahahahaha got 'em all fooled! bwahaha *cue Darth Varder theme*